When I was in secondary school, we had some boys who you can’t really categorise whether they were students of our school or they have another school they really belonged.
My school was within a complex that has five secondary schools and five primary schools in it. It was a very vast space of land, with each of the secondary schools having its own sets of buildings and walls around it that separated it from other schools within the complex.
Though we had five secondary schools within the complex, but it seems there were students who made an addition to those five. They don’t come to school often, and when they come they don’t stay for long.
They gather themselves and stay somewhere we call “Banana Bush”. It was a place within the complex but not within the wall of any of the five schools, and it easily links to outside of the school complex.
These guys would leave their homes and resume to Banana Bush. From there, it was easy for them to go home or anywhere they wished to go at any time they wanted to. So, we generally referred to the place as “school six”. They stay there and chat, go to watch football matches, go wherever they wanted and go back home after they’re done. They were joking with their lives and future. Many people are like them in life today, people we can refer to as jokers with life.
There are many jokers in this world who don’t know they are jokers. Many people are joking with their lives and destinies, they are using their future to play in the present, and some don’t even know it. Let me talk on the aspect of relationship and marriage and tell you how so many people joke with their future in that area.
If you want to get married and you don’t bother to seek good knowledge about marriage, you’re one of the jokers in life who are playing with their futures. How could you plan getting yourself attached to someone you’ll meet one day from nowhere, with whom you’d live the rest of your life and not bother seeking knowledge about how you’ll know when you meet the right one or not? You’re a joker!
A guy called me just a sometime ago. He had posted a question on one of our Happy Marriage Training Platforms, and he was referred to call my line for consulting. When he called, he said he’d been in a relationship with a girl and he felt was the right person, but he wanted to be sure and know how to know if she’s the right person.
I asked some questions, his response made me to understand that he’s one of the few people who are serious about their lives and future. He was planning to get married the following year, he had seen the woman he felt he truly loves, but he still wanted to be sure that this was the right person for him.
When I gave him the terms for our consulting, his response showed he was really serious about getting married rightly, not just getting married but rightly and be happy in his marriage.
Now, that’s someone who’s taking his life and future seriously. But, most people don’t. I have spoken to so many people this year alone who you know are getting ready for marriage but not getting ready for a happy marriage. You know a team of footballers could be getting ready to play a match but not getting ready to win the match.
Just like most students who are preparing for exams are not preparing to excel or pass well, there are many singles preparing to marry but not preparing to have a happy marriage.
They are not getting ready to be happy and have constant joy in that marriage. They are only preparing themselves to get attached to somebody, not working to know how to attach themselves to the right person or what to do and not do that’ll make them to be constantly happy when they get attached.
In the last few months I have with My Queen been privileged to directly and indirectly help train and talk with more than 7,000 persons on marriage and relationship matters, and I can tell you that most people are more concerned about how glorious they want their wedding to be than how happy they want to be in their marriage.
Some married people who have consulted us and who we’ve had the privilege to help would have avoided the critical problems they have in their marriages had they sought marriage training before they got married.
But the tragedy is that many singles are walking the same road. They don’t really care about the future as long as the present is looking attractive. That’s a very dangerous thing to do and that’s how you know real jokers in life.
I have watched and listened to young women wept in great bitterness because of their few months old marriages. It is now they discover they made a mistake by marrying that guy.
But, that mistake could have been avoided or corrected had they afforded themselves the privilege of an adequate training that would give them a better preparation for a happy marriage.
Though there is still hope. If they can do certain things, things would change. But, like a young woman whose marriage was two years old that once consulted us said, she wasn’t sure if the change she saw in her husband would last. I told her if she keeps doing what I counseled her to do that has brought about that change she saw, the positive change would remain in her home.
If you’re already married, except the marriage is physically abusive or dangerous to your life, find a way to make your marriage work. There are no impossible men or women in the world, and there is nothing that is impossible in this world. You just need to do one or two things, and keep doing them.
If you’re ready to learn and then do what’ll make you see the positive change you desire in your husband or wife, you’ll surely see the positive change you want to see in that marriage of yours. You just need to be ready to pay the price for a happy marriage.
If you’re still single, don’t jump into marriage because of what you think you know. Seek knowledge. Do training. Seek counsels. If all your focus is on the wedding and not the marriage, you’re a joker in life, you’re joking with your destiny. Wedding is just a single day event. After the wedding, what next?
One of the ways you’ll identify jokers in life in the aspect of marriage is when you see someone who’s saving and planning to spend hundreds of thousands or millions in money on wedding, but who finds it difficult to pay just a little amount of money for marriage training.
Jokers take their wedding day as more importantly than their married life. They can spend all their savings, earnings and then go ahead to borrow more to do wedding but cannot take a hundredth division of their one month earning to pay for a marriage lecture.
If you marry wrongly, all your years in school, efforts in life, investments in your career and your parents’ sacrifices on you might just turn out to be in vain. An example of this is those who get murdered by their spouses.
Their lives end and so was their knowledge, career and everything they had ever acquired in their lifetime. If you’re going home everyday to meet a man or woman that is frustrating your life and not making you happy daily, your life would become miserable. Is that what you want?
Do you know that there are many consultants and experts on marriage issues, who help people to fix or know what to do to fix their marriages, and the people pay enormously? But, how many training centres do you see that teach people how to marry rightly?
You can only find those ones in churches and religious organisations’ free seminars. Why, general people don’t usually pay for such things, only sensible people do. Where do you belong?.
The generality of people don’t pay to learn how to marry rightly before marriage. They prefer to marry wrongly and regret later. But most people pay to learn how to fix a marriage that’s breaking, pay doctors for treatments when they are beaten, battered and wounded in their marriages, and pay lawyers to sue their spouses and seek for divorce.
But if they had paid a marriage trainer or relationship consultant before or towards the marriage, they would have avoided the tears, pains and waste. But, because they are not amongst the sensible sets of people but only in the general category, they don’t. Where do you belong?
That was why we started Happy Marriage Training Programme (HMTP), to help people have a HAPPY and SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE by training the Singles on HOW to CHOOSE the RIGHT LIFE PARTNER and the Marrieds on HOW to HAVE a HAPPIER MARRIAGE.
We focus more on Singles because if they can get it right before marriage by marrying the right person, they will almost automatically get it right in marriage and have a happy marriage.
We want to give people what we have, and teach them how to have it too. It is all by the GRACE OF GOD, but there are things you need to know and do to ENJOY THAT GRACE. It is those things we teach at HMTP.
In the last few months we have trained over 7,000 from more than twelve nations, and more than 95% of them for free, we’ve been doing that for over two years. We recently started our paid training and consulting.
You pay a token but you get something that’ll help you forever, something that will help you choose rightly and marry and be happy for the rest for your life in this world, or move your marriage from a troubled marriage to a happy marriage. Whatever you pay for that is a token compared to what from it.
Seek knowledge, get training. Don’t marry to regret, but marry to enjoy. If you could spend six years in primary school, six years in secondary school and four or more years in tertiary school training for a career that you can easily change your mind over tomorrow, how much more about a marriage that would be permanent and that probably will permanently determine how you’ll live the rest of your life on earth?
Parents, help your children to get trained for a happy marriage so you’ll not lose your many years of investments on them. Help them to marry rightly through adequate training. Those parents who have lost their children to unhappy marriages are forever regretting today. Don’t join them!
Call or WhatsApp +2347030371153 Immediately for the Help You Need for Your Marriage and Relationship.
I am A. T. ADENEKAN
Founder, The King’s People Connection & Happy Marriage Training Programme